I Believe–Community

I’ve learned a lot about creating community through my work with people who have developmental disabilities and inclusion of people from diverse cultures and communities. So I could sit here and share my understanding of how to “build community” from those perspectives. But I’ve found that bringing what I learned in my work into my personal life is very difficult, and I’m not sure why.

I believe that community is what we are built for. If we were not wired to reach out to others, I think there wouldn’t be this hole in my heart that was left by people that I loved moving on with their lives. On Facebook I have 655 friends. I’ve found people that I started first grade with, people from high school and college, and people I’ve met through work. I’ve met bloggers, life coaches, disability advocates. But I still feel alone when I’m not on the computer, and even when I’m online, it’s not the same as having people to share community with where I am.

How do you reach out to people? I’ve always been shy, but it was so much easier when I was younger. Now I don’t seem to know how to open up to people the way I did back then. College was wonderful. My first grad school still had a community I felt a sense of belonging with. Now I feel lost. Just one friend outside my marriage would be wonderful. I can’t recapture the past–time has moved on. But how do I?

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One Response to I Believe–Community

  1. Lana – I totally get what you are saying about the online community. It is so wonderful and has been a lifeline for me as well. And, it leaves you lonely when you’re not in it if you have nothing else to enhance it.

    I was talking to a coach of mine about this issue, and I told her I was frustrated that I had no community in Asheville. She gently “smacked me upside the head” and told me to quit telling myself that story.

    So I did. I changed my perspective that I DO have opportunities here, and slowly, I am starting to see it emerge. It’s far, far from what I want, need, or had in Denver. But I feel confident that my new mindset will help.

    What kind of stories have you been telling yourself about your community??

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